Ahhhh....Life!

Hmmm....I have an interesting feeling....I feel like I want to BLOG!
I don't even know what I have to say, but I feel like if I keep typing then something is going to come out.  I tried to do another blog before but it was always a chore to write something... I felt like I had to say something profound or amazingly meaningful in order to get people interested.  I'm actually beginning to realize that this blog isn't about other people.  It's also not really about how many people read it either. This is about me, living my life and expressing myself.  I feel really good about all the things that I've learned so far and I know that I'm only going to grow more each and every day!  I've let go of all regret for past decisions because I know they've gotten me to where I am now.  I'm happier and healthier because of my choices to make CHANGES when things weren't working.  I'm a Cancer. Not sure how many of you are into astrology, but Cancer's are notoriously resistant to change! We dig roots and we hold on for dear life.  I felt that growing up so strongly, but as uncomfortable as it was to accept, my family had quite a few changes. I think they forced me to see that sometimes, change is not only good, but NECESSARY to pursue your happiness.  I saw my parents make good and bad choices for themselves and how it affected them both. I also saw how miserable they got when they refused to make those changes.  I guess that's why, at times, when I started to feel trapped and unhappy, I made changes...sometimes good ones and sometimes not so good ones, but those definitely taught me lessons. 
My Motto: If at first you don't succeed, try again...I may have seemed like I had no idea what I was doing, and sometimes I didn't, but I never regretted moving forward.  Sometimes I misdirected my energy and changed the wrong thing, but I was always guided back to the real problem. When I felt stuck, I got depressed, angry, frustrated, and felt like a victim in my life.  When I made NEW choices, not repeating the same choice in a different way, but truly turning in the opposite direction, is when I found peace.  I could be free.  I could make mistakes because I could change my mind.  Every experience is to get us somewhere different then we are right at this moment. Some moments have been easy and amazing, others have been extremely difficult, but they've helped me to figure out what I WANT in this life and what I don't.  If I didn't have the "negative" experiences, then I wouldn't be able to say with clarity that I don't want that in my life!  I welcome my daily experiences with open arms....if something bothers me, I ask why? If I can change my belief or my perception to see the situation differently, then I will...sometimes changing that belief or perception requires me to change my life situation as well.  All change is good.  It helped me to get rid of the attachment that I had to so much "stuff" that really wasn't important.  The more I clung to things and ideas, the longer I let them control my life, the more they became something that held me down and made me feel stuck.  At some point, I think over the past 3 years or so, I figured out that life really is an adventure!
 I now look forward to feeling the downs as well as the ups as fully and completely as possible because they make me see my Soul.  I believe this life is just one experience that my Soul is having...THIS is the playground...this life is what I make it, what I choose to see and experience. It's not about getting from birth to death in the safest and most responsible way.  My experience has taught me the opposite; it's the risks I've taken that teach me the most and give me the most pride in myself.  I love my life and I would not change a single moment of it.  My goal is to pay attention, each day, to see what gifts and guidance I'm receiving.  It's the little things... being tired and teaching a yoga class where my students inspire me with their strength...having a patio lunch with a dear fellow yoga teacher on a perfectly gorgeous weather day...not looking forward to a theta session, not knowing where to go with it, and trusting my intuition so much even when I had no idea why I was saying what I was saying, only to have it turn out exactly the way it needed to, teaching us BOTH positive lessons...This day was great and I hope that you too see the little things that shaped your world today. 
Wow...I guess something really did come out...I'm going with it ;-)

That's my sense,
Jess <3